To ask or to surprise? – Sage advice from men on shopping for women

By Dixon Bledsoe

Remember the look of disbelief when your wife opened up her “Elvis” Chia pet for Christmas in 1971? Odds are you didn’t receive the reaction you thought you would.

What about the time you surprised your girlfriend with a diamond ring and  earrings? My guess is that sort of “shock”  was a lot more fun.

How about when your s.o. (significant other) kept hugging you for hours because the Christmas gifts she opened happen to be the first five things on a list that mysteriously appeared on your pillow Black Friday? Good surprise, or surprised that you could follow directions? As the holidays approach, there is a certain anxiety men experience as they try to determine whether it is better to surprise their partner with an unexpected gift or give her the one she is expecting.

To learn how men would answer that question, I set off to interview a few “Men on the Street.”

Not surprisingly, the men’s answers were unanimous, regardless of their age because guys are, well, guys. They like spontaneity, hate asking for directions and are not always adept at planning well in advance. They all like surprising the women in the lives with a gift. And these shoppers all appeared smart enough to leave the crock pots and vacuums  on the discount shelves, having learned that housework gifts only serve to annoy and disappointment.

So, men, as you prepare to delve into the shopping frenzy, here’s some sage advice.

Chuck Tauer, 66, of Silverton has an interesting perspective. “That is a loaded question. Surprising her is best, but there are qualifications. It is better as a surprise only if you know what you’re doing and what she wants or something you know she would like.”

Kory Diess of Dundee, 32, is all for surprises. “It keeps Christmas exciting when you or your partner doesn’t know what the gift is.”

Jeff Maddux, 45, of Vancouver agrees. “Christmas should be a time of fun and adults getting excited like kids. A surprise gift is cool because it goes against the grain and is unpredictable. The older you get, the more predictable you get.”

Sam Ayhan of Silverton, 42, feels like surprising people is more fun. “Who wants to know what the gift is? It takes the thrill and anticipation out of opening presents. It makes it more fun like kids, even when you get older, and hopefully you know your spouse well enough to get her something she is going to like.”

I am the same way. From designer clothing to jewelry to a trip to Arizona, I have enjoyed finding a way to surprise my wife.

Jason Hendricks, 35, of Silverton, summed it up nicely.

“It is so fun to watch your partner’s reaction when she opens up something she loves but didn’t know she was getting. That is the Christmas spirit.”