The Man About Town: Those are some ugly…

July 2010 Posted in Columnists & Opinion

By Jim Kinghorn

Yes, we have finally reached the dog days of summer and speaking of dogs, pack your pooch to Silver Gardens Care Home on July 16 and check out its first dog show. Call Dodie Brockamp at 503-873-5362 for information. Your pooch will enjoy a chance to show you off around town.

When you look at old family photographs it’s pretty common to look at styles from a bygone era and say “wow, them is some ugly glasses.” Now you’re in luck, as Silver Falls Eye Care is having an Ugliest Glasses Contest on Aug. 12. Just bring in those fugly frames and get an updated pair for half off and celebrate 30 years of practice with Dr. Terri Vasche.

Silverton Super Service closed its doors. Thin profit margins make the gasoline business tough to survive in. The days of Clarence Dahlberg are unfortunately over and that makes The Man sad.

Mount Angel’s Glockenspeil Restaurant is presenting a fundraiser for the new community building. It’s  called “Spaghetti in the Streets”….. now, this sounds a little unsanitary to The Man but the July 19 event is sure to be a lot of fun.  Tickets must be purchased by July 16 so get busy and call 503-845-6222 to order yours. After dinner you can stroll over to the Village Bandstand and listen to the Marion County Citizens Band concert and top off the evening with a free root beer float courtesy of Mount Angel Telephone’s 100th anniversary.

Also in the Village of the Bells, comes word that there are three positions open for city council (imagine that) and also for mayor. If this sounds like fun, you might want to first seek professional help and if you’re still not deterred, the required forms are available at city hall.

For some reason The Man finds it refreshing that the recent disruption of Wave Broadband service was due to a squirrel’s desire to have a high fiber (optic) diet. Wave’s Joe Wisner reports  unfortunately Rocky is no longer with us. It’s good to be reminded from time-to-time that no matter how proud we humans are of our technological advances, simple acts of nature are always there to knock us down a notch.

Mario Montiel has opened his own Edward Jones Investments office in the Silverton Realty building. After sharing an office with senior Ed Jonesian, Tim Yount, Tim told Mario “You have learned well, grasshopper, it’s time to fly and be free.”

Scotts Mills Treasures in … duh…Scotts Mills is hosting the first annual Town Sale on July 30-31. The Man was not able to verify if they have really been authorized to sell the entire town but there will be more than 15 families offering antiques, men’s stuff, household items and, of course, the ever popular “so much more.” Maps will be available on the days of the sale to guide you to the untold wealth of bargains and deals that await you. For info, visit scottsmillstreasures.com

The Man
saw an infomercial the other day that was fantastic. There was a “preacher” by the name of Peter Popoff who claimed he could “supernaturally” cancel all of my debt. I have heard of debt consolidation loans; credit counseling services and even getting a second job as ways to reduce debt but none of those methods sound even close to “supernatural.” All I have to do is pay him for some miracle spring water and an anointed faith tool (whatever that is) and bam, my debt is erased just like that. One lady on the show said she had been homeless and now she had gotten a $50,000-a-year job and, get this, a new Volvo! Woo hoo, my troubles are over and you know, The Man has always really wanted a new Volvo. I think I will sign up right after I send for that “one weird tip to reduce my belly fat”…

See you on the street…

Man About Town is a collection of hearsay, rumors and the occasional fact.  If you’ve got a tip, call The Man at 503-845-9499.

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