By Carl Sampson
I have a problem and I don’t know there’s anything I can do about it.
I have an overwhelming addiction.
And, no, Tiger Woods and I don’t have the same problem, although I bet he wishes he had mine instead of his.
My addiction has to do with books. And magazines. And newspapers. I love to read.
If I could, I would read every minute of every day. The only thing that even comes close to my love of reading — besides you-know-what — is writing.
Actually, I may like writing more than reading but my primary problem is reading.
I’m besieged with reading material because most folks know I like to read so when they run across a book they like they don’t just recommend it — they give me the book.
It was a small problem at first but it has since become a big problem.
A friend once gave me a biography of Hubert Humphrey, who is, I believe, one of the coolest politicians ever. I read the book and set it aside. Seven years later, when we were getting ready to move, I ran across the book and noticed that it was from the local library.
I didn’t know what the fine was on a book seven years overdue and I didn’t want to find out. I just dropped it in the return chute on my way out of town.
Most recently, I’ve received books by Sarah Palin, David Sedaris and Michael Pollan. They’re stacked on my bedside table, along with the mountain of other books I been trying to find the time to read. So far, the only thing I’ve been able to figure out is that Sarah’s photos are better than David’s or Michael’s.
It gets worse. A few months ago, our son Peter had some frequent flier mileage to use or lose, so he was offered a variety of magazine subscriptions. We now receive Time, Sunset, Travel & Leisure, Jet, Ebony, Money and Entertainment Weekly.
And here’s the weird thing: I like to read them all and they stack up, too.
We’re in the midst of trying to move across town. I say “trying” because my little problem is becoming a big problem. Every time we clear out a few boxes of books and magazines, they’re replaced by more.
I can hear the techies out there saying that the answer to my problem is simple. All I have to do is get one of those electronic book things, like an iPad or Kindle. Then I can download a book and I’ll never have a stack of them accumulate.
Yeah, maybe. But on occasion, when one of the cats is making racket in the middle of the night, I’ll throw a book at it – paperback, of course – in an attempt to get it to shut up.
If I tried to do that with a Kindle, I’d have another problem. I’d probably hurt the cat – and definitely damage my checkbook.
